I Really Tried to Like the Wonder Woman Movie

I really tried to like Wonder Woman. Really, I did. As one of my ultimate favorite superheroes, I was more than excited when they announced she would get her own standalone movie. Still, I found myself dazed, confused, and well…bored upon seeing her grace the big screen.

As someone who’s always prided himself on being one of the few people in my circle who can actually enjoy things without picking them apart, this was a hard pill to swallow. I went to see a movie with a 92% Rotten Tomato score, and I ended up being unimpressed with it as a whole.

A few things that really bothered me?

The Action

The action scenes were amazing…when they weren’t constantly interrupted by slow motion close-up shots. Diana would kick a bad guy. Said bad guy would fly out of a window in slow motion. Time would speed up when Diana turned around to face another baddie…only to slow down again when she reached for her sword. Every. Single. Punch. Nearly every step taken in an action scene involved the overuse of slow motion. It became jarring the majority of the time.

The Pacing

This movie was too long. Let’s face it. Much of its screen time could have been reduced, especially the scenes in the third act. By then, it felt like the movie was padding itself to make you wait until the inevitable final boss battle at its climax. Hopefully this doesn’t become a habit with DC’s movies being overlong just for the sake of it (looking at you, Justice League).

The Villain

For every wonderful superhero, there has to be a bad guy or a bad situation that truly elevates the story and raises the stakes. Ares’ anticlimactic reveal at the end of the film was both disappointing and boring. By then, I was ready for the end credits to roll, and the fight scene between the two was nowhere near as impressive as Wonder Woman’s fight against Doomsday.

You have to understand. Wonder Woman is one of the most iconic superheroes of all time, male or female. After the unnecessarily botched Batman v. Superman, much was riding on Wonder Woman’s big screen success. With Marvel continuing to kick DC into the ground in terms of consistency, redemption was necessary.

Enter Wonder Woman. No, literally. I’m still amazed at how someone can mess up a movie about Superman and Batman fighting each other, but it still happened. One thing many critics agreed on? Wonder Woman was the best part of the movie.

So, no I didn’t have a problem with Gal Gadot’s performance. I didn’t think the story was lackluster. I thought it was pretty consistent with its source material. I didn’t have a problem with the woman-only screenings or the ridiculous politics surrounding the film. I simply didn’t like it. Yet, I understand and respect its position as a game-changer for female superheroes (and female leads in general).

Your Thoughts?

What Are Black Women Supposed to Look Like?

I will never fully identify with the struggle of what black women have to deal with no matter how many superficial things we have in common. Yes, feminine black gay men and heterosexual women love to shop, get our nails done, talk about boys, the list goes on. However, I do such things out of pure, unnecessary vanity. Every day, black women endure a painstakingly meticulous metamorphosis into their best-looking selves out of survival.

Heterosexual men often dictate what is considered “appropriate” when it comes to how women dress and style themselves. However, there always seems to be a few archetypes that these men seem to be drawn to. Some of us know her as the big-breasted, blonde, blue-eyed princess who likes playing video games and not asking men where they’ve been all night. Others know her as the bronze skin, exotic-looking enchantress who can wash her face 25 times a day and still look like an Instagram model. It’s usually never the afro-wearing, full-lipped (natural, I might add), chocolateer who dares to give up setting her scalp on fire to look less threatening to the masses.

One could say the standard of beauty is being chopped and screwed as people realize the difference between objectivity and subjectivity. However, with black women, there remains a constant hovering force that is always waiting to tell them they aren’t good enough. They strive to fit in, make themselves softer, become submissive, all in the name of trying to find their own identity. But how is that possible when the playbook is in the hands of a greasy bearded, socks with sandals wearing, sink showering individual with no concept of what it takes to truly live up to the ultimately unrealistic standards placed upon these women?

The rules keep getting changed by men who put the same amount of effort into their appearance as they did when they were in elementary school. That’s a problem.

When you have people like Wannabe Womens’ Studies Graduate Fast & Furious star Tyrese and rappers like Kendrick Lamar declaring they want women who look “natural” and not “photoshopped, ” it comes across as insincere (to put it mildly). Why the sudden change of heart? This time last year, those same Instagram baddies were getting wifed up left and right. Kendrick, in particular, tells women to “Show me something natural like afro on Richard Pryor” but proceeds to have no black women with afros in his “Humble” music video, never mind the fact that the entire song includes him telling “bitches” to “sit down and be humble.”

So I have to ask a few questions. What exactly are black women supposed to look like? How much makeup is too much makeup? If her hair can’t grow past her shoulders, what then? Are you willing to champion her efforts as a man to wear her natural hair in the workplace, on the covers of Vogue, on television?

And why can’t black women decide for themselves what looks good on them?

 

 

Chile Please! Dave Chappelle Defends Donald Trump, Criticizes LGBT & Womens Rights

Dave Chappelle. photo by: Danielle Levitt/Comedy Central ORG XMIT: MIN2012082211060153
Dave Chappelle. photo by: Danielle Levitt/Comedy Central ORG XMIT: MIN2012082211060153

Everyone’s favorite troubled comedian had a lot to say at an NYC show last night. I mean, he was supposed to be doing comedy, but we all know most of Dave Chappelle’s stand up routine concerns current events.

Except this time we’re not sure we can back him on this one.

Continue reading “Chile Please! Dave Chappelle Defends Donald Trump, Criticizes LGBT & Womens Rights”