Category: Lifestyle

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Is It Brutal Honesty or Just Brutal?

We view brutal honesty as the ultimate honesty.

We tell our loved ones we’re “keeping it real” before we proceed to eviscerate their life choices. Then, they get defensive and rail back on us for hurt feelings. We, in turn, claim we’re just “calling it like we see it.”

But is it all even necessary?

At what point does brutal honesty become just brutality? Are we lying to ourselves about what it means to honest with others? I have a few points to consider.

Are Your Beliefs the Absolute Truth?

It’s important to distinguish fact from opinion. Just because you believe something to be true, it doesn’t mean it’s reality. Let’s consider the phrase, “I just tell it like it is.” Exactly what is it? Think about what you believe the person’s problem is versus what they’ve actually told you.

For instance, I had an interaction with a friend recently. I told them I was having a bad day. They proceeded to say “Quit complaining and do something about your life. I don’t want to hear you moan and groan anymore until you do!”

I was actually at a point in my life where things were going exceptionally well. Most of my days went swimmingly. That particular day wasn’t going great. So, where did my friend get everything else from?

Turns out, they were basing their opinion on events that happened to me several years ago. They remembered when I was at a low point in my life and for some reason hadn’t caught up since. That goes back to belief versus facts. The fact was me saying I had a bad day. The belief was my friend thinking my life was in shambles and in need of fixing.

See the difference?

Are You Helping or Hurting?

Brutal honesty usually comes across as negative. I’ve personally never heard someone say, “I’m gonna be brutally honest with you. You’re an amazing, talented person.” Instead, I’ve heard, “I’m going to tell you something you might not like…” followed by an unnecessarily harsh monologue.

Think about it. Is negativity towards someone designed to help? Doesn’t positive reinforcement work better than tearing someone down just to “toughen them up?”

Is your intent to truly help someone or simply get something off your chest? How you say something is just as important as what you say. Do you ever offer praise or encouragement? If honesty is the goal, shouldn’t those aspects also be a focus?

Consider the Relationship Dynamic

Too often, brutal honesty occurs in a relationship that is unequal (or perceived that way). A high-level exec at a company may berate a lower-level employee. Afterwards, that exec might “flower it up” by calling it tough love. However, if the tables were turned, would this be acceptable? Probably not.

If a person perceives themselves to have it “more together” than someone else, they’ll usually feel comfortable giving that person advice. However, would the person who has it “together” be okay with the other person administering tough love? Probably not.

Butal honesty too often gets rooted in a need to feel superior while belittling others. Consider how you’d feel if someone you perceived to be “less than” gave you the same advice you give others.

Why Do You Need to be Unkind?

We live in the age of social media and its perceived cancel culture. Naturally there will be those who resist what they feel is censorship. In a time where facts often get discarded in favor of opinions, we also misconstrue what counts as honesty.

Truth doesn’t have to be unkind. It doesn’t have to hurt or demolish. So, why do some of us gravitate towards the brutality of it? The world is filled with cruel words, especially on social media. We, in turn, believe that we’re helping others by feeding into that negativity by giving our unfiltered opinions.

Except, it doesn’t have to work that way, especially with people we care about. Being able to tell the truth without hurting is a sign of emotional maturity and empathy. People have feelings, and they’re allowed to protect them.

How Do We Gain Emotional Maturity?

It starts with a sense of self. In my book, Life After Low Self-Esteem, I talk about the many methods I used to overcome self-doubt and low emotional intelligence. The good news? Anyone can overcome any of the items mentioned. Check it out, and let me know what you think!

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What to Expect from Your First Therapy Session

Any therapy session can seem daunting. Opening up to a stranger feels like a monumental task, or even downright impossible. So, having a few misgivings about the first session is normal.

Still, your first therapy session doesn’t have to be frightening. In fact, with a little prep work, you can expect a positive experience. Let’s go over what to expect and how you can ready yourself beforehand.

How to Prepare

How do you prepare for a therapy session? The answer varies for everyone. We all have have different needs and expectations.

It helps to start by identifying your emotions. What are you feeling right now? Do you have any concerns about therapy? What do you feel consistently troubles you?

You don’t have to just focus on what’s “wrong.” Think about a goal you want to accomplish after you start therapy. Where do you want to be after, say, 5 sessions?

Keep a running list and read that list out loud to yourself. Tuck it away somewhere safe for you to reference later. You’ll be needing it.

Honesty & Establishing Needs

Here’s the thing. Therapy doesn’t work without honesty. And therapy is something that you’re going to have to work at. Many people hold onto the misconception that simply attending sessions leads to improvement.

I wish I could say it was that simple. Unfortunately, it’s not. There may be times where you have to dig up some uncomfortable stuff. And it will feel EXHAUSTING. That’s part of the process.

That’s why it’s important to communicate and establish boundaries with your therapist. Express what your triggers are as soon as possible. Your therapist will work to ensure you feel comfortable enough to open up to them.

What Questions Should I Ask?

It’s expected you’ll be curious as well as cautious. In fact, any therapist worth their salt expects plenty of questions and concerns.

You may hear words or phrases you don’t quite understand. Ask for clarity and don’t be afraid to speak up. Your therapist wants to help you. You shouldn’t feel intimidated or ignored.

Refer to the list I mentioned earlier and bring it with you if you’re worried you’ll forget any concerns you might have.

What Happens After Your Therapy Session?

Hard part’s over right? You made it through your first session! So, now what?

Now, it’s time to do a mental and emotional check-in. What are you feeling? HOW are you feeling? Identify your thoughts and emotions as clearly as possible.

Consider also how you felt about your therapist. Did you feel a connection? Do you feel like they were listening to your concerns? Not every therapist will be a good match, and that’s okay. You may end up trying out several before you find someone you feel comfortable with.

Develop a Strong Foundation

Many instances of depression or anxiety can be traced back to low self-worth. A positive outlook on life can be achieved through improving self-esteem. My book, Life After Low Self-Esteem, shows how that can be accomplished.

Remember. Therapy isn’t a quick-fix, and it doesn’t have to be terrifying. With preparation and patience, you’ll succeed.

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Being Lonely Shouldn’t be Terrifying

Lonely. It’s a word few of us say out loud.

We know someone who seems lonely, and sometimes we perceive them to be miserable. After all, we’re conditioned to believe “miserable” and “loneliness” go hand-in-hand.

So, we don’t talk about how lonely we are. Instead, we push that feeling away when it materializes. We don’t want to be miserable or be perceived as such.

However, we don’t have to fear being alone. It’s possible to work through those feelings of loneliness while eventually establishing new bonds and relationships. Let’s go over a few ways to accomplish this.

People Want to Hear From You. Reach Out

As I mentioned before, shame often accompanies loneliness. We feel like we have it stamped on our forehead, so we avoid others. We retreat into our safe places, running from the idea of someone else knowing.

The truth? It’s not as bad as we think, even if someone else knows we’re lonely. In fact, it’s an opportunity to show that it’s not a big deal.

We hesitate at times to reach out because we think “If they’re not reaching out, they must not want to hear from me.” Honey, if they’re your friends/family, of course they want to hear from you. Reach out!

Break the Negative Thought Cycle

Be kind to yourself. And honest.

Sometimes, we’re going to get it wrong when it comes to emotions. We all do it. It’s normal, and it inspires growth. That’s why it’s so important to be able to identify what we’re feeling and respond appropriately. We’re able to break those negative thought patterns this way.

Sometimes, we create these self-centered views based on our negative emotions. We assume people don’t like us, which is why we’re lonely. However, if we’re honest about our situation, that’s usually not the case.

We have friends and family who love and support us. We’re just focused on the emotion that’s most intimidating. Happiness doesn’t scare us as much as loneliness does.

When we’re overcome by loneliness, it’s important to stop and identify it.

Join a Community. Help a Cause

Perhaps now you’re ready to do something about feeling lonely. So, where do you start?

Many people find benefit in volunteering or joining cause. It’s a chance for individuals to meet new people with shared interests. If you’re new to an area, for instance, it’s a great way to not only help your community but get to know it as well.

It’s also a great time to practice those social skills! Not everyone thrives on social energy, and that’s fine. Some people are more introverted than others. Some are shy and need a little time to warm up to new faces. With time and the momentum gained from interacting with like-minded individuals, it’s much easier to establish bonds and friendships.

Beyond that, volunteering combats the effects of stress, depression, anxiety, and much more. What you put into your community ends up coming back to you. That’s something to reflect on!

Remember Your Sense of Self

It all starts with knowing who you are. In my book, Life After Low Self-Esteem, I touch on practices to establish a positive self-identity. Check it out and let me know your thoughts.

And remember. Loneliness is nothing to fear.

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Stop Waiting for People to Understand

Sometimes people just aren’t going to get it. So stop waiting.

There’s going to be a part of your mental health journey where you’re a complete mess. That’s okay. It happens, and people don’t have to understand.

And it’s not always your job to explain yourself. Let’s go over a few reasons why.

You Need to Accept Your Mess

Not a “hot mess.” God, do we still say that? Well, stop. It’s not 2013 anymore. Anyway, stop resisting the fact that you’re in a rough spot. Don’t punish yourself for not having it 100% together at this precise moment.

If your house is a disaster, for instance, accept it. If your friends or loved ones are complaining about it, let them know you need more time to figure things out. Yes, you don’t want to wallow in filth forever. Don’t do that. However, don’t kill yourself trying to keep up appearances.

You Have Nothing to Prove

You set the standards. No one can pass judgment on your progress. And you want to know something? You’re not going to please everyone anyway.

You ultimately know your limits and what’s best for you. Your potential and capabilities are not a secret to yourself. You have so much to offer. Don’t overlook it. That means, at the end of the day, you know if you’re giving each day your best shot. That’s all that matters.

Your Worth Should Never Be Tied Into Other People

We want people to love and care for us. That means that we sometimes want their approval. However, we shouldn’t sacrifice our happiness just to appease them. That’s not self-love. It’s co-dependency.

I talk about being a recovering co-dependent in my book, Life After Low Self-Esteem. Give it a read and recommend it to anyone you know who struggles with low self-worth. People don’t have to understand our struggle. Just keep pushing forward.

And stop waiting.

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Yes, Kanye West Can Still Be Held Accountable. Period.

We should show compassion for Kanye West and his struggle with bipolar disorder as his wife suggested.

Her official statement:

“As many of you know, Kanye has bi-polar disorder. Anyone who has this or has a loved one in their life who does, knows how incredibly complicated and painful it is to understand. I’ve never spoken publicly about how this has affected us at home because I am very protective of our children and Kanye’s right to privacy when it comes to his health. But today, I feel like I should comment on it because off the stigma and misconceptions about mental health.”

“I understand Kanye is subject to criticism because he is a public figure and his actions at times can cause strong opinions and emotions,” she continued. “He is a brilliant but complicated person who on top of the pressures of being an artist and a black man, who experienced the painful loss of his mother, and has to deal with the pressure and isolation that is heightened by his bi-polar disorder. Those who are close with Kanye know his heart and understand his words some times do not align with his intentions.”

We still need to hold him accountable for his actions.

These actions include declaring slavery was a choice (for the slaves), saying Harriet Tubman didn’t free the slaves, and jumping on the Trump train for a time. Yes, being a Trump supporter is very problematic. Leave now if you think this is debatable. It’s not, by the way.

Mental Illness Does Not Excuse Bad Behavior

Let me start off by saying I want Kanye West to get help. He desperately needs it given his recent statements. He comes across as very erratic and disjointed, and no I will not chalk it up to “just being a genius.”

He is not a troubled artist. He is a man suffering from untreated bipolar disorder.

As the topic of mental illness gains widespread recognition and understanding, it’s important to remember that bad behavior is ALWAYS inexcusable. It’s never okay for someone to mistreat you and blame it on their mental illness.

It is not okay to use mental illness as a way to avoid personal accountability. Kanye has every resource at his disposal to treat his condition and refuses to do so. As Kim stated, there is little she and the rest of the family can do about it. As a result, he has to be the one to seek help.

His inaccurate statements about black history not only cause damage but spread needless misinformation. This can’t come at a worse time. We’re in the middle of a cultural enlightenment to systemic racism, after all.

We do not need false statements about a prominent historical black figure. And we do not need them spread across social media.

It’s okay to call him out on that and expect him to correct his behavior.

Celebrities Are Not Above Reproach

We place celebrities on too-high a pedestal at times. Because of this, we don’t view them as actual human beings. At least, we don’t until they do something messed up. Then, we take pleasure in their misery.

The entire culture is toxic and disturbing, but that’s a dissertation for another day.

Still, no celebrity is above being criticized for their actions. Yes, even my beloved Beyonce can be scrutinized. Our culture reinforces the importance and value of celebrities every hour of every day.

We believe we’ll never be as good as them. So, we further cement into our psyche that they’re “untouchable.”

And speaking of reinforcing….

We Perpetuate & Reinforce the Wrong Beliefs

By refusing to hold someone like Kanye West accountable, we reinforce negative beliefs. We perpetuate the idea that people with mental illness are immune to consequences. As a result, they don’t seek the proper treatment they are in desperate need of.

Kanye’s irresponsible spread of misinformation then becomes all the more problematic. He can freely use his platform to mislead and potentially brainwash. As stated earlier, we’re highly susceptible to celebrity influence, which makes this espeically dangerous.

So again, we MUST continue to show compassion to individuals suffering from mental illness. We must NOT, however, continue the belief that said mental illness cancels out consequences.

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When Cutting People Off Becomes Toxic

So, I went into detail about why I let people go. For most, the act of cutting people off emerges from a place of self-care. We realize we are being mistreated, and we seek to remedy the problem.

However, just like with anything, there’s a wrong way to go about it. Instead of cutting ties with toxic people, YOU become the toxic person needlessly burning bridges.

Let’s walk through a few ways this can happen.

When You’re Not Honest With Yourself

Be honest. Did your boyfriend really treat you as badly as you claim he did, or were you exaggerating a little? Did you eject that long-time friend from your life because they did something wrong? Or was it because you didn’t properly communicate your expectations?

Something I’ve been guilty of is expecting people to know what I want from them. I’d get frustrated because I’d think “Why is it so hard for them? I don’t expect much anyway!”

So, when they’d make a misstep like forgetting my birthday, blowing me off to hang with other people, etc, I’d just nix the friendship without communicating with them. Then, they’d be confused and hurt, and we’d both end up with unresolved issues. Nothing would get solved.

Turns out people can’t read your minds, and you can’t read theirs. They also can’t be held accountable for things you never properly address.

When You Simply Isolate From Everyone

Sometimes we think we’re punishing others by removing ourselves from their lives. We think to ourselves “This’ll show them!” as we deactivate all of our social media accounts and refuse to answer anyone’s texts.

Then, inevitably, we realize this solves little and wind up returning to our circle with our tail between our legs. We don’t punish anyone but ourselves.

Isolating from others does more harm than good in nearly any situation to begin with. If you feel neglected by others, it’s better to communicate with them as to why.

When You Recruit People to be Spiteful

You’ve decided to bestow your boyfriend with the ex qualifier now. You’re officially done with him for life, but that’s not enough! Now you have to get your friends, family, and pets to disown him as well.

You decide your best friend has disrespected you one-too-many times, so you break free. Except now you want the rest of the circle to leave them out as well. So, all of you regularly go out without including them.

Now imagine yourself in the other person’s shoes. Would you like it if an entire group suddenly shunned you and left you out? And we’re talking about for minor offenses like forgetting birthdays, not cheating or trash talking. Does it really warrant all that?

Now, I’m not saying you shouldn’t have boundaries. It’s okay to express to people that you need your space. What’s not okay is banding a troop together to slander and tarnish someone because of a bad breakup, relationship or otherwise.

It Starts With a Sense of Self

Cutting people off shouldn’t always be the answer.

The above scenarios happen usually because we need to work on our communication skills. We struggle to express our feelings sometimes because we feel we can’t stand up for ourselves.

This often stems from low self-worth or self-esteem in the individual. That sounds a little drastic, right? Except, it’s not! Improving your self-worth is relatively easy and something I recommend to most people who struggle with communication. Check out my book, Life After Low Self-Esteem, for more details.

And remember. Cut people out when it’s appropriate, not because you’re afraid to express yourself.

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I Cut People Out of My Life, and I’m Not Sorry About It

I’m pretty brutal when it comes to cutting ties. It’s swift, deliberate, and it’s usually permanent. I don’t cut people out of my life just to bait them into coming back.

I make peace with their eventual absence long before I make my decision. It sounds cold-hearted, and it certainly can be if utilized incorrectly.

Let’s get into reasons why I banish certain people.

I Am No Longer Your Doormat

I used to not stand up for myself, especially in relationships, due to low self-esteem. I’d allow myself to be constantly mistreated just to maintain a connection. I once even swooned over a dude who convinced people I was stalking him. Crazy, right?

I was so afraid to stand up for myself and want better. Would people mock me or take me seriously? Could I stand to be alone without someone to talk to or be intimate with? I always thought the answer was no.

That was until I learned how to speak up.

Now, it all comes naturally. I no longer tolerate what I consider blatant disrespect in any form. And I never will.

Our Friendship is Likely One-Sided Anyway

I am the former king of one-sided friendships. It’s a hard habit for me to break because I naturally want to give and make people happy. I don’t want people to feel as awful as my depression has made me feel.

But that doesn’t mean I have to do all the work.

No, I will not make all the plans. You can figure out what you want to eat on your own for a change. Maybe you can actually remember my birthday this year. I’m tired of you flaking out and excusing it with your mental illness. Also, I have a mental illness too. Respect people’s time. The End.

This Isn’t Anything I Haven’t Already Told You

You’ll pretend like it is, as if I’m just being hysterical and unfair. It’s unfortunately what people tend to do when they’re called out.

And unfortunately for you, it won’t work with me.

No, this is not the first time I’ve brought up you forgetting my birthday, flaking out on plans, etc. We’re more than likely in the double digits on the number of reminders now.

I’m not going to keep having the same argument about the same thing. Why should I? So you can gaslight me into thinking I’m nagging you all the time? Nope, you can fade into “Random iPhone text data” obscurity.

Life is Too Short. I Deserve Better. Period.

I cut people out of my life because I know my capabilities and my limits. We are not promised any new day in this life. I have to make the most of every moment with people I love who love me back.

I used to believe I expected too much out of people. It wasn’t until I revamped my self-esteem that I discovered I expected too little. I highly recommend reading my book, Life After Low Self-Esteem, if you struggle with self-worth.

We are not settling for anything less than what we deserve.

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Taking Care of Yourself Also Means Educating Yourself

We need self-care tips more than ever now. It’s imperative that we discover ways to keep ourselves mentally, physically, and emotionally healthy. But did you know taking care of yourself also involves education?

I know what you’re thinking. Maybe. Perhaps, you believe you’re done with “schooling.” You’re probably like me. You got your degree, realized it was useless, and burned yourself out on “learning.”

Well, don’t give up on education yet! It’s never too late to learn something new. Let’s run through a few ways to stimulate your mind.

Don’t Just Veg Out After Work Every Day

I’ve mentioned before that there’s a difference between self-care and self-indulgence. Watching TV after a long day at work is certainly relaxing. I definitely partake after my hectic work days.

Still, it’s important to practice moderation. A study conducted by Tohoku University found that watching excessive amounts of TV can lower your IQ. If you really think about it, that adds up. Even though I love it, what exactly is intellectually stimulating about most reality shows?

I’m not saying cut TV out of your life completely. For me, I need that period of time to just have something playing as I untangle my brain for a few minutes. Just don’t forget to find a way to stimulate your mind at least once a day.

Reading Helps Reduce Stress

Yes, you’re going to have to start reading if you don’t already. It’s an integral part of taking care of yourself.

According to research, reading helps alleviate stress more than other mediums. In fact, it can reduce stress by about 60% in just 6 minutes. It’s more beneficial than taking a walk, listening to music, or even playing video games.

Reading achieves this by lowering your heart rate, easing muscle tension, and altering your state of mind. We all love to escape into a new world when we read, right? Well, now you have even more reason to.

Learn Something New. Make New Mistakes

Say it with me. It’s okay to get it wrong at first. Learning is all about making mistakes, if we’re being honest.

Don’t be afraid to learn or try something new. Whether it’s a new skill or simply a new word, make every effort to expand you mind. Learn how to cook (or find a way to improve it). Expand your vocabulary by learning one new word a day. It’s really that easy.

You’ll be surprised how accomplished you feel no matter what the task is. I go into more detail in my book, Life After Low Self-Esteem. Be sure to check it out and recommend it to anyone you know.

And remember. It’s never too late to start educating yourself.

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Okay, I Admit I Am Sad. Now What?

I am sad. I admit it. So, now what do I do? Where do I go from here? Is this just sadness, or is it something more?

We all get down from time to time. Life comes at you fast. So, what are some things we can do to “nip it in the bud” so to speak?

And what if we feel like it’s more than just sadness? Let’s cover a few ways we can work out our emotions and plan for success.

How Can I Tell the Difference Between Depression and Sadness?

Sadness is an emotion everyone experiences periodically. It can be brought on by a life change such as a death in the family or a job loss. There’s a specific trigger behind it.

Many benefit from just “letting it all out” with actions such as crying, venting, or recreational activities. These actions serve to alleviate the mental and emotional pain we’re experiencing due to sadness. Of course, it’s important to remember what counts as healthy self-care and what doesn’t.

It’s also short-term and passes with time. However, if feelings of sadness last beyond a 2-week period, it could be a sign of depression.

You can find resources for depression and other mental health needs here.

What Can I Do If It’s Just Sadness?

  • When I am sad, I normally turn to cleaning. Clean something you’ve been needing to spruce up for a while. There’s a soothing sense of satisfaction that comes with the act. For me, a messy head equals a messy mind. So, I strive to tidy up when I can.
  • Exercise and do a workout you’ve been wanting to experiment with. Go to the gym! I’m a huge procrastinator, and I have to work myself up just to put my workout clothes on. Still, even the act of walking into the building can put you at ease and motivate you.
  • Help someone else out with something. There’s always someone in need. Whether it’s errands or a quick favor, help people. Think about how you feel when someone makes your day. Now put that energy out there!
  • Write your feelings out. I’m not saying write an entire novel. That’s a very demanding process. Find something that works for you. You can diary, blog, or just jot some thoughts down here and there. When I am sad, poetry helps me turn my thoughts into art. I always feel accomplished and creative once I’ve completed a poem.
  • Ask for Help. Don’t feel like you need to go through this alone. Besides, you never know who’s gone through the same thing and can empathize. Sometimes, just knowing someone else understands is all that we need.

What if it Happens Again?

The first thing I want you to do is not be hard on yourself for being human. Sadness is a natural state that we all experience. Don’t be ashamed or afraid of it.

Allow it.

Then, I want you to remember the points we discussed earlier to help alleviate some of those feelings. When you stay ready, you don’t have to get ready, right?

If you or someone you know is suffering from mental health issues, here’s a link with a pretty extensive list of resources for you. I also wrote a book about overcoming low self-esteem, which I highly recommend.

Don’t be afraid to be sad.

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“Think Happy Thoughts” How About You F**k Off?

Yeah, we’re going there. Listen, happy thoughts are important. Let’s acknowledge that. Good? Awesome.

Now let’s talk about people needing you to be chipper and upbeat at all times. That’s when I kindly tell you to fuck off. We don’t need to be all smiles and rainbows 24/7 lest we be doomed to a life of misery and sadness.

Why? Let’s get into a few reasons.

It’s Toxic As Hell

Toxic positivity is where people think you should be positive all the time no matter what. You should embrace all positive thoughts while rejecting negative ones. So, basically, if you’re having a bad day, it’s because you’ve chosen to.

And that’s complete, utter bullshit.

It’s important and healthy to address those negative thoughts as well as the happy thoughts. When we avoid the difficult feelings, we stunt our growth. We don’t learn how to properly communicate. And we assume any negative feeling we have is a character flaw.

It’s not, by the way.

The Negativity Grows Instead of You

When we ignore those harsh feelings, they don’t simply vanish into thin air. They stay with us and grow until we can no longer ignore them. We end up lashing out at someone or something. Or we avoid them altogether.

Our negative emotions are designed to help us identify potential threats. We may see a dangerous animal in the road. Our immediate emotional response is fear, right?

Fear is a negative feeling. Yet, it’s a natural response meant to ultimately help us, just like sadness and anxiety. So, why are we meant to be ashamed of our instincts?

Short answer? We shouldn’t be ashamed. Instead, we should be figuring out what’s causing them.

It Doesn’t Make You Superior When People Can’t Relate to You

You aren’t better than anyone because you choose to ignore your negative emotions. You aren’t “enlightened” because you read the first 3 chapters of The Secret. Don’t mistake a false sense of self-righteousness with tranquility and understanding.

For one, you’re not coming across enlightened. To many, being fake positive all the time comes across as unapproachable. People feel like they can’t relate to you. Or they feel like they’ll get lectured for having the audacity to be in a bad mood that day.

It’s not cute, boo. It’s tiring.

A High Sense of Self-Worth is Key

So don’t actually tell these people to fuck off, right? Let’s make friends. Instead, push towards an elevated sense of self-worth.

I recommend reading Life After Low Self-Esteem and sharing with anyone you know who struggles with low self-worth.